lgbtq
Finding LGBTQ+ Safe Spaces
A resource-focused guide to identifying affirming shelters, organizations, and contacts.
lgbtq safetyresources
Safety & Support Options
Finding LGBTQ+ Safe Spaces
Quick overview
This page outlines practical options for finding LGBTQ+-affirming safe spaces, both in-person and online. It focuses on:
- Community organizations
- LGBTQ+-affirming shelters and housing options
- Online safe spaces and digital communities
Availability of LGBTQ+-specific services can vary by region. Some general services may still have individual staff who are affirming and informed.
Community organizations
Types of community orgs to look for
- LGBTQ+ community centers
- Queer and trans youth programs
- Two-Spirit and Indigenous-led LGBTQ+ groups
- Campus LGBTQ+ resource centers (universities, colleges, some high schools)
- LGBTQ+ faith-based or spiritual groups
- LGBTQ+ health clinics or sexual health centers
- Local Pride committees or advocacy groups
How to identify safer community orgs
- Check if they clearly state support for LGBTQ+, trans, and non-binary people on their website or materials.
- Look for inclusive language about partners (e.g., “partner” instead of “husband/wife”).
- Review any mention of domestic or relationship harm support.
- Look for visible signs of inclusion in photos, staff bios, or programs.
- See if they mention training on LGBTQ+ issues, trauma, or anti-violence work.
Questions you can ask before visiting
- “Do you have specific services for LGBTQ+ or trans people experiencing relationship concerns or harm?”
- “Are any of your staff trained in supporting LGBTQ+ survivors?”
- “How do you handle privacy if someone is not out to their family or community?”
- “Do you offer support in languages or formats that match my needs?”
- “Is your space physically accessible?” (if mobility or sensory access is relevant)
Ways community orgs might help
- Offering support groups or one-on-one support
- Connecting you with LGBTQ+-affirming shelters or housing options
- Helping with safety planning or referrals to legal and medical resources
- Providing a space to use phones or internet more safely than at home or with a partner
- Helping you navigate identity documents, name changes, or gender marker changes that intersect with safety planning
LGBTQ+-affirming shelters and housing options
Types of shelter or housing options
- Domestic violence or relationship harm shelters that state they are LGBTQ+-affirming
- Trans-inclusive shelters with written non-discrimination policies
- LGBTQ+-specific emergency shelters or short-term housing programs
- Youth shelters with dedicated LGBTQ+ programs or staff
- Safe home networks or host homes organized through trusted organizations
- Short-term stays with vetted volunteers arranged by community orgs
How to assess if a shelter is LGBTQ+-affirming
- Look for non-discrimination statements mentioning sexual orientation, gender identity, and gender expression.
- Check if they accept people based on self-identified gender rather than legal documents.
- See if they mention inclusive intake practices for same-gender or queer relationships.
- Ask how they house trans and non-binary residents (e.g., by gender identity, access to private rooms, bathroom policies).
- Ask if staff receive ongoing training on LGBTQ+ and trans issues.
Questions to ask shelters (if safe to do so)
- “Do you support survivors in LGBTQ+ or same-gender relationships?”
- “How do you ensure safety and privacy for trans and non-binary residents?”
- “Are there any limits on who can stay based on gender, documents, or relationship status?”
- “Can you keep my location and identity private from my partner, family, or community members?”
- “Do you have private or semi-private spaces if I feel unsafe in shared rooms?”
Documents and information that may be requested
Not every shelter will request all of these, and policies vary. Asking what is required can help you decide whether to proceed.
- Name and contact information (you can ask about using a preferred name and safe contact method).
- Basic details about your safety concerns or relationship situation.
- Any protection orders or legal documents you want them to know about.
- Medical or access needs relevant to your stay (allergies, mobility, medications).
Safety considerations when going to a shelter
- Plan how you will travel there and whether anyone could track your route.
- Ask how their address is shared and whether it is confidential.
- Decide which personal items you can safely bring and what to leave.
- Ask whether your partner or family could contact or visit the shelter.
Online safe spaces
Types of online spaces
- Moderated LGBTQ+ forums and discussion boards
- Closed or private social media groups vetted by trusted orgs
- Text-based chat platforms run by LGBTQ+-focused organizations
- Discord servers or similar communities with clear rules and moderation
- Subreddit-style communities with strong moderation and safety rules
How to assess whether an online space feels safer
- Check for posted rules about privacy, respect, and anti-harassment.
- Look for active moderators who remove harmful content and enforce rules.
- Review how they handle doxxing, outing, or sharing screenshots.
- Prefer spaces that allow pseudonyms and do not require linking to real-name profiles.
- Notice if members respect pronouns, identities, and different kinds of relationships.
Digital privacy steps to consider
- Use a separate email address not known to your partner or family.
- Create usernames that do not include your legal name or common identifiers.
- Adjust privacy settings so your activity is hidden from public profiles or friend lists.
- Review whether your device or accounts are monitored before joining new spaces.
- Use browser privacy tools or different devices if you are concerned about being tracked.
How online spaces can support safety
- Offering anonymous or semi-anonymous peer connection
- Sharing practical strategies from others with similar identities or situations
- Providing links to local or regional LGBTQ+-affirming services
- Helping you test out language for describing your situation and needs
- Allowing you to connect at times or from places that feel safer than in-person visits
Coordinating multiple safe spaces
Some people use a mix of in-person and online resources. You can:
- Use an online group to identify local LGBTQ+ centers or shelters.
- Contact a community org to ask which online groups they consider more reliable.
- Keep notes (stored safely) about which spaces felt more respectful and which did not.
- Plan in advance how you would move between spaces if one becomes less safe or comfortable.
Additional tools and professional supports, including LGBTQ+-focused services, can be found through resources listed at DV.Support.
Questions to help you compare options
- Does this space clearly affirm LGBTQ+ and trans identities?
- How is my privacy protected here (online or in-person)?
- Can I use a name and pronouns that feel right for me?
- Are staff or moderators trained and active in managing harm?
- What information do I need to share, and what can I safely keep private?
- Do I have more than one option if this space stops feeling workable?