Safety Guide for Roommates & Shared Housing

Guidance for navigating safety while living with roommates or multiple occupants.

Roommate Safety Guide

Privacy Zones

Options for defining and protecting private areas when living with roommates.

• Identify your privacy zones:
  • Your bedroom
  • A specific drawer, box, or shelf for important items
  • Digital spaces: phone, laptop, email, cloud storage, social media
• Decide what is strictly private vs. shared “by permission only”:
  • Examples: journal, medical documents, bank information, ID cards
  • Devices and chargers
  • Keys, fobs, access cards
• Use simple physical boundaries:
  • Bedroom door lock that you can safely control
  • A small lockbox or locking file folder for documents
  • Labeled containers (e.g., “Private – ask before using”)
• Protect digital privacy:
  • Use strong, unique passcodes for phone and devices
  • Turn off screen previews for messages and emails
  • Log out of accounts after use on shared devices
  • Use two-factor authentication where possible
• Review who has copies of keys:
  • List who has front door keys
  • List who (if anyone) has your bedroom key
  • Plan how to manage keys when someone moves out

Shared Spaces

Options for setting up common areas to reduce conflict and improve safety.

• Map out shared spaces:
  • Kitchen
  • Bathroom(s)
  • Living room and hallways
  • Shared storage, laundry areas, parking spots
• Clarify what is shared vs. individually owned:
  • List shared items (cleaning supplies, dishes, furniture)
  • List personal items that are not for shared use
• Set simple access expectations:
  • Quiet times for using kitchen or living room
  • Bathroom use expectations (time limits, guests)
  • Guidelines for guests in shared spaces
• Consider visibility and surveillance:
  • Discuss whether anyone uses cameras or smart devices in common areas
  • Clarify rules about recording audio or video in the home
  • Decide where personal video calls are okay (e.g., bedroom vs. living room)
• Plan for storage safety:
  • Keep sensitive documents in your private zone, not in shared areas
  • Avoid leaving work or school materials with personal data in common spaces
  • Use opaque containers for items you prefer not to display

Communication Signals

Options for simple, low-conflict communication about safety and boundaries.

• Set basic house communication rules:
  • Preferred method: text, messaging app, written notes, or in-person
  • Times that are okay or not okay to discuss house issues
  • How far in advance to flag visitors or overnight guests
• Create quick “status” signals:
  • Door sign or hanger (e.g., “in a meeting,” “do not disturb,” “okay to knock”)
  • Short text codes to say “I need quiet,” “I need the bathroom soon,” or “Not available to talk”
  • Agreement not to knock repeatedly or enter if there is no answer
• Plan for safety-specific signals:
  • A phrase or word that means “I need help, but I can’t explain right now”
  • A phrase that means “Please give me space, I’m not okay to talk”
  • An agreed way to ask a roommate to remove a guest if you feel unsafe
• Address conflicts early using structured options:
  • Use written lists for house issues instead of spontaneous arguments
  • Schedule brief “house check-ins” if that feels safe
  • Use neutral language focused on actions (e.g., “Please text before bringing guests”)
• Plan for outside communication:
  • Decide what roommates can say to others about your schedule or location
  • Clarify if they may share your phone number or social media with anyone
  • Explain if there is anyone you do not want given information about you

Escape Routes

Options for planning how to exit the home or a situation as safely as possible.

• Map physical exits:
  • List all doors you can use to leave the unit
  • Note windows that could be used in an emergency, if safe and lawful
  • Identify stairwells, fire escapes, and building exits
• Check for obstacles:
  • Notice furniture or locks that could slow you down
  • Keep main pathways as clear as possible
  • Note any doors that stick, jam, or are hard to open quickly
• Choose primary and backup routes:
  • Primary route: the door and path you would usually take
  • Backup route: an alternate door, window, or stairwell
  • Third option: leaving through a public space (lobby, shared yard) if needed
• Plan where you might go immediately after leaving:
  • Public places nearby (store, café, library, community center)
  • Trusted neighbor’s door or building common area
  • Safe outdoor areas with other people around
• Prepare a small “go” setup if that feels useful:
  • A place where you usually keep keys, wallet, and phone together
  • Copies of key documents stored outside the home or digitally (if safe)
  • A mental checklist of items to grab only if it does not increase risk
• Think about time-of-day differences:
  • Daytime options vs. late-night or early-morning options
  • Weekday options vs. weekend options
  • Building access rules that change at night (locked doors, staff on duty)

Recommended Articles

• Safety Planning Checklist
• Gathering and Storing Evidence
• Technology and Digital Safety
• Living With or Near an Abusive Partner
• Preparing to Move Out Safely